九月二十七日[mp3_embed playlst=”/downloading/audio/evening/09/0927.mp3″]
经文: 我的良人从门孔里伸进手来，我便因祂动了心。（雅歌五：4）
我的心睡意大浓、天气又寒冷，你虽敲门，我并不愿意起来开门。但是祂恩典的触摸使我灵苏崇。啊，看我“良人”所受的痛苦！祂因被关在门外而等候，我却因自己的庸懒而贪睡。请看祂伟大的忍耐，一而再地敲门并呼喊，要我为祂开门！我怎能如此忍心拒绝祂！我的心因羞耻而下拜，看祂那极大的仁慈，亲自摸到门闩将门打开。现在我明白除我主自己的大能，没有其它能力可以将我从罪恶中拯救出来。宗教无益，甚至福音失效，直至祂的手向我伸出。除祂以外，别无他人能开启我心。每当我思想祂为我所受的一切痛苦而我不慨然回应时，我灵就搅扰不安。我竟然让我的感情徘徊游荡。我竟与祂为敌，我竟使祂忧伤。我所爱中最甜美最亲爱的，我待祢竟如不忠之妻子对待她的丈夫！我残忍的罪、我冷酷的自我啊！我当作什么呢？眼泪不足表示我的忏悔，我整颗心因对自我愤怒而澎湃。我是何等邪恶，竟然对待我的主、我生命的喜乐，如同对待一位陌生人。耶稣啊，我明白祢愿意饶恕我，但是这样尚嫌不足，求祢阻止我以后别对祢不忠。求祢吻除我的泪，洗净我心，将它系住，让我心不再徘徊流浪。
Evening, September 27
Scripture: “My Beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him.”(Song of Solomon 5:4)
Knocking was not enough, for my heart was too full of sleep, too cold and ungrateful to arise and open the door, but the touch of his effectual grace has made my soul bestir itself. Oh, the longsuffering of my Beloved, to tarry when he found himself shut out, and me asleep upon the bed of sloth! Oh, the greatness of his patience, to knock and knock again, and to add his voice to his knockings, beseeching me to open to him! How could I have refused him! Base heart, blush and be confounded! But what greatest kindness of all is this, that he becomes his own porter and unbars the door himself. Thrice blessed is the hand which condescends to lift the latch and turn the key. Now I see that nothing but my Lord’s own power can save such a naughty mass of wickedness as I am; ordinances fail, even the gospel has no effect upon me, till his hand is stretched out. Now, also, I perceive that his hand is good where all else is unsuccessful, he can open when nothing else will. Blessed be his name, I feel his gracious presence even now. Well may my bowels move for him, when I think of all that he has suffered for me, and of my ungenerous return. I have allowed my affections to wander. I have set up rivals. I have grieved him. Sweetest and dearest of all beloveds, I have treated thee as an unfaithful wife treats her husband. Oh, my cruel sins, my cruel self. What can I do? Tears are a poor show of my repentance, my whole heart boils with indignation at myself. Wretch that I am, to treat my Lord, my All in All, my exceeding great joy, as though he were a stranger. Jesus, thou forgivest freely, but this is not enough, prevent my unfaithfulness in the future. Kiss away these tears, and then purge my heart and bind it with sevenfold cords to thyself, never to wander more.
